First, You Cry. Then You Suck.

So I'm watching the Cubs blow a 5-1 lead to the Cincinnati Fucking Reds, aka The Worst Team East of the Rockies, and marveling at how many ways this team can lose a ballgame. And give this shitty Reds team a split.

They can fall behind early and not give a shit (if formula is Kerry Wood=Curt Schilling{-blood/World Series rings}), as they did last night and in the doubleheader at Atlanta,

They can match another team run-for-run and end up losing 12-10,

They can end up in a 2-1 nobody-hits, nobody-cares game,

They can rally twice and fall short in extras, as they did against Washington before the All-Star Break,

Or they can score a passel of runs early and think they'll coast to victory while the bullpen decides getaway day was yesterday.

Like they did today. Against a team so bad you'd have to walk them a ton to let them back in a game, then BALK in the tying run, forget how to throw from the outfield, and then give up a single to a guy who just got back from the MINORS to lose the...oh.

Wild-card fever: Catch it. Not.