Monday, February 26, 2007

What a Night!!!

Not.
Oscars over. Whatever. Good for Martin Scorsese, good for Alan Arkin, Jennifer Hudson's career is on 14:58...and begin. (Don't blame me, it's the curse.)

Look, I'm sure we can all agree that Pilobolus is an artistic amalgamation of the highest water, but seriously. What the hell? This is why the Oscars run long every year. The producers, or the Academy, or ABC, or all of these out-of-touch bastards, seem to think the watching public wants some sort of cheesy, and I mean cheesy, entertainmaent quotient to go with the bling and the gowns and he hot guys in their bedhead. But is there a codicil in the Oscar bylawas or something that states they have to employ a certain amount of dancers ro extras for this one night? Evry year they manage to totally fuck up the "live entertainment" portion of the program, because not only are all the best song nominees the type of David Foster-Diane Warren bullshit Celine Dion got famous singing, but the dancing is always attached to something unbelievably stupid, like the Rob Lowe/Snow White thing in 1989, or the Costume Design thing the next year (thanks, Debbie Allen!) or even managing to co-opt and render impotent a treasure like Savion Glover, or Pilobolus last night. Look! Pilobolus make shoe!

Cut the extraneous dance bullshit, the show would be 20 minutes shorter. Also, put ALL the nominees down on the main floor, and that would take five minutes off right there. The Pan's Labyrinth people were all up in the secon section of the main floor, and God knows they won a lot, so why can't they give the real honest-to-Christ nominees better seats? And in that case, shouldn't somebody's ego take a fucking hit for a night? Like some dickhead producer who didn't get any nominations? Or a publicist or agent whose clients are either non-nominees or Jessica Simpson? Let these fuckers and their egos sit in the back for a change.

I forgot. It's Hollywood.

I suppose ABC doesn't complain about the show runnng long, not with all the ad dollars they pull in, and they win the night every year anyway, I'd guess. Maybe it's just the print media, who are on deadline, and the great unwashed who complain.

And fianlly, I must strut. Nobody listened to me about Eddie Murphy. It's the Norbit Curse, sez I!

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