Didn't you hear me the first time, Bobby?

I said FUCK YOU!
No? Well, thanks for the opportunity, here it is again! FUCK YOU, MOTHERFUCKER!!!

No, no, shut the fuck up. You dont get a fucking pass just because the Cubs came back to win (gimme Koyie Hill, y'all) and some fence-jumping asshole was even stupider than you tonight. Fuck you, you first-ball-fastball-throwing idiot. I mean, shit. There's a novel approach:Let's let as many guys score as we can before getting anyone out. To make sure they score as many as they can to fucking WIN, I'll throw a fat-ass fastball over the fucking plate for a three-run home run. Nothing special. Because I'm as fucking inconsistent as I can fucking be.

I remember the White Sox against the Angels, in Anaheim, it was either 92 or 93, I think, and they were up by like two or three and their bullpen ended up giving up about eight runs. Just brutal, slap hits and an occasional bomb, over and over again, regular as sleep. And at the time I thought that was the worst bullpen performance I'd ever seen.

And then Scott Fucking Eyre shits on the mound and Bobby Howry wipes everyone's fucking face in it. Well, congratulations, King Shit. You're the new champ.