Monday, July 25, 2005

Just Musing, But...

...When did the tie stop going to the runner? You know what I'm talking about, so wipe that look off your face. It's a rule, right? Well, no, since the rule of thumb is that it's impossible for an umpire to judge a tie, and that a runner is either out or safe. But tell that to the guy who gets called out on a highlight-film close one at first. We've all seen them: Jason Kendall or Jim Thome or some slow guy hits a ball in the hole or up the middle, shortstop falls over, does two cartwheels, bakes a bluebery pie, does his wife's taxes, counsels wayward children, sets up his home entertainment center, and finally throws the ball across the infield with enough velocity to come close enough to make the play interesting. And he's usually out, because the runner is a catcher or a 38-year-old pitcher, and with a normally speedy runner the issue is moot. But it seems like every night there's one ump who gives the defense the out just because the play made it close. Baseball umpires are incredibly learned and exceptionally accurate. But that "effort appreciated, credit given" shit needs to go away.

...Did L'oreal Men Express think we wouldn't notice they've given voice-over work to Dennis Miller? Why, L'oreal? why would you do that? Let me put it in Mileerese for you. L'oreal: This guy's more tired than a two-year-old at a New Year's Eve party. Dennis Miller is more over than the bear and the mountain, Cha-Cha.

...What's the deifference between Terell Owens holding out from the Eagles "for [his] family" and Larry Brown leaving the Detroit Pistons early "for [his] family"? Aside from an annoying agent who includes himself in his clients intended actions, I mean. Like Drew Rosenhaus is strapping on pads. He'd weep like a baby if he saw these guys on the Eagles defense coming at him.

...As would I.

...Seriously, Owens is being regarded as a Benedict Arnold, especially in Philly. The "doing it for the family" thing doesn't seem to be doing him any favors, nor are Rosenhaus's hardball tactics. (Drew, take a look at the media coverage being afforded one Thomas Cruise Mapother IV right now. Now sssh.) But Brown appears to be doing the same thing to his team that Owens is, leaving the Pistons in the lurch while stating that he's doing it for his family. (And as of right now, Brown's gone, whilst TO is only threatening to hold out. Not like that's a comfort to fans in Philly.) I can't doubt either fellow's inentions, because I don't know them or their families. But TO is getting pilloried and Brown's getting yawns. Why? Is it because TO is a self-aggrandizing loudmouth? Is it because Brown is a famously nomadic coach who can't be expected to finish what he starts? Does Brown really think his medically-induced stress problems are going to abate if he takes a job coaching the New York Knickerbockers? Oh, you dmon media, you need to apply those nutty standards you occasionally love to flex. Evenly, if you please.

...Think George Bush would miss Karl Rove if he has to fire him in the next couple of weeks? Nah, 'cause a Supreme Court nomination's not that big a deal. Like a ten-cent soda doesn't cost a dime.

2 Comments:

At 6:45 PM, Blogger rs6471 said...

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At 7:17 PM, Blogger Antonio Hicks said...

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